Feel And Heal

Breakup letter to 2018.      2018, thank you. I truly do thank you, from the deepest darkest bottom corner of my heart.      You taught me to be selfish. I think even now you’re still attempting to teach me this, even though your time is done and you should relax and let 2019 take over.      I’m glad you’re done. Your lessons were painful and I wish I would have known just how bad they would be because I might have wanted a different teacher. One with an easier, softer teaching method.      I had to learn to be selfish because otherwise I would have burnt myself out. I would have used all the energy in me to fight events that were doomed to happen anyway, and I would have done that until it killed me.      It was during your time, 2018, that I began learning that it is not my duty to save my sister. It is not my duty to save anyone, that I could grasp, but I was not able to let go of the res...

I stand in a pool of liquid gold.  Over time the tide has risen  and the shimmering fluid is nearly  at my waist.  It is not solid, nor does it impede  my motion. In fact as I walk it flows slowly, gifting me with new grace.  When I gently toss bits of it here and there,  helping to fill other pools,  mine gets brighter and the call for more rises in strength.  It pulses, and dances,  and swirls through my form and it is beautiful.  With hands raised in open prayer I hear it. My vision catches up to my hearing  and I am able to see it.  A bright funnel, a mass of lights and sparks, races the stars towards me.  It descends and envelops me,  lifting me higher in its wind,  spinning me in delight,  kissing every inch of me.  I am washed in gratitude,  softened with love,  dressed in blessings.